Me - Are value judgement based stand-offs worth resolving.... More so when the lessons from history play out like a leaf from the Sun Tzu treatise! Or is it best to just walk away in the hopr that one less battle might make the war a bit more bearable today.
AAAAAh the vagaries of relationships tested on the nit pickin morality of righteousness.
Imputing intent to have the last word on things.
Character assassination to justify one's feelings.
The sordid one oneupmanship in relationships....That sweeps all the good that once existed...
2:50 PM
9th April 2007.... You told me "You should write about relationships". And I said I don't do reported speech very well. Thankfully! I still don't.
Helps avoid reruns in the head after the immediate fact!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
The engine of life
Me - One oft understands but is often not understood too. How important is it to be understood? And to what lengths does one go to be. That is the basic conundrum in relationships and the cause for chatter.
Concern is the starter impulse that cranks and ignites all the combustibles present in the engine of life in a given moment. Leads to some loud, idle revving and noxious exhausts. The ignition metamorphs concern to fuel anger.Till theres the choking and sputtering once the inflammatory material is exhausted.
Leads to a cleansing of sorts!
Concern is the starter impulse that cranks and ignites all the combustibles present in the engine of life in a given moment. Leads to some loud, idle revving and noxious exhausts. The ignition metamorphs concern to fuel anger.Till theres the choking and sputtering once the inflammatory material is exhausted.
Leads to a cleansing of sorts!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Rapprochement...
I can't say that I'm sorry that I cut you off. I don't deal with grays in my life. There are very few meaningful relationships in my life. Three to be precise. I can't afford any ambiguity in them, for my peace of mind.
When expectations surface, then something is off. Fundamental questions get asked and they can have painful consequences. We are part of those consequences. I wanted to remember you as you were. Unspoilt by the vagaries of our respective lives. Looks like time had something else in store...
Hi friend.
When expectations surface, then something is off. Fundamental questions get asked and they can have painful consequences. We are part of those consequences. I wanted to remember you as you were. Unspoilt by the vagaries of our respective lives. Looks like time had something else in store...
Hi friend.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Its just this...
Me - I think the best part of my existence is, the ability to be doing nothing tangibly, and not notice that. To have no To-do list. To be location impervious. And be able, most times, to pick up the thread of that that one chooses to follow. To not be bothered about the members of ones responsibility frame, beyond provision of material support that one can/
Its just this!
Its just this!
Friday, June 25, 2010
Boosters
Me - Half past 7.
Soon a third will be heaven.
3 boosts to a stick,
as the day unfurls.
A liteness of being,
Sweet lethargy suffusing.
Moments strung along
Just doing what you're doing.
So come morning side.
No agendas bark or bite.
No dreams to chase,
No haste making waste.
Just thots seeded random
And impulse in gay abandon.
Up up and away,
Have a great day!
Arun - At such times I envy you.
Me - ....U gotta do, what you gotta do...
So just dew what you gotta dew!
Soon a third will be heaven.
3 boosts to a stick,
as the day unfurls.
A liteness of being,
Sweet lethargy suffusing.
Moments strung along
Just doing what you're doing.
So come morning side.
No agendas bark or bite.
No dreams to chase,
No haste making waste.
Just thots seeded random
And impulse in gay abandon.
Up up and away,
Have a great day!
Arun - At such times I envy you.
Me - ....U gotta do, what you gotta do...
So just dew what you gotta dew!
"I Am"
Arun - I am that by which I know "I Am".
Read it now and at least ten times when you are stoned and then write back.
Me - Good suggestion. Laying my hands on a copy of the book is a minor issue tho! And about the cyclical reading.....I don't know. One either gets it or doesn't, reflecting and trying to understand.
Arun - I am not asking you to read this book. Just contemplate on this statement.
Me - Ooooops...My bad as Hollywood would put it.
After the Brazil - Portugal game and another boost!!
I am that, by which I know "I Am".
I am that - awareness and understanding of a facet. A piece in a jigsaw that falls in place at eash "I am that" moment or situation. And as the picture emerges intoa more recognisable image. I am that by which I kknow "I Am" takes on the hue of the process by which one gets to know that "I Am". I Am, that by which I know "I Am'. And the perception play starts.The image composite as the pieces of the jigsaw fall in place is tangible and theres a sense of completeness in getting the whole picture.If that evolves to the process then the image from the jigsaw is seen as justanother piece of a larger jigsaw. I am that, and now Im on the path to knowing that by which "I Am". Parts of a whole all right, but whats the whole? So is it that, or that by which one knows that, I AM.Where does the larger picture end! I Am that. Yes. I Am.
That I am, that by which I know, "I Am".
Reflect. Punctuate. And you get a new perspective. Still only words. Does the soul that I Am, express differently.
How many times have you read it and how many joints have you had? Out of 10 times, 5 should be without joint. You will get a still different perspective. Try it!!
Me - You had said "I am that by which I know "I Am".
Read it now and at least ten times when you are stoned and then write back." I was only folowing that instruction. Now you're changing the rules.
Arun - You should also reflect on--What is that, by which I know I Am.
Me - "What is that, by which I know I Am."
OK. Here goes:
If I think about it, the I walk the road trying to find out. In some moments or situations, theres a sense that I Am. Aloof, just an observer, though rarely focussed on oneself. Just calm, non-reactive, uninvolved. A detachment I oft term apathy. Thats an outcome of a whole host of other seeming constants like not feeling, caring, not wanting or desiring, that are facets of me that influence, what is that by which I think know "I Am".
No certainties, no illusions. So what is that by which I know..... Purely knowledge, experience and intellect I guess! Applied through the stream of reason in a framework that, Nature and Nurture evolved. I think I can draw an analogy to our conversational content.....Its like a yin-yang rubbing of a yin-yang space, thats smoothening the alignment of the conceptual interface!
Arun - OK, now next exercise. Which of the two statements you agree with and why:
1. I think, (therefore) I Am.
2. I Am (therefore), I think.
Me - First reaction was a good laugh......
Me - Is there a perspective difference between: I can think therefore, I Am and the statements without the element of choice. I think (therefore), I Am makes it a prerogative activity!
Read it now and at least ten times when you are stoned and then write back.
Me - Good suggestion. Laying my hands on a copy of the book is a minor issue tho! And about the cyclical reading.....I don't know. One either gets it or doesn't, reflecting and trying to understand.
Arun - I am not asking you to read this book. Just contemplate on this statement.
Me - Ooooops...My bad as Hollywood would put it.
After the Brazil - Portugal game and another boost!!
I am that, by which I know "I Am".
I am that - awareness and understanding of a facet. A piece in a jigsaw that falls in place at eash "I am that" moment or situation. And as the picture emerges intoa more recognisable image. I am that by which I kknow "I Am" takes on the hue of the process by which one gets to know that "I Am". I Am, that by which I know "I Am'. And the perception play starts.The image composite as the pieces of the jigsaw fall in place is tangible and theres a sense of completeness in getting the whole picture.If that evolves to the process then the image from the jigsaw is seen as justanother piece of a larger jigsaw. I am that, and now Im on the path to knowing that by which "I Am". Parts of a whole all right, but whats the whole? So is it that, or that by which one knows that, I AM.Where does the larger picture end! I Am that. Yes. I Am.
That I am, that by which I know, "I Am".
Reflect. Punctuate. And you get a new perspective. Still only words. Does the soul that I Am, express differently.
How many times have you read it and how many joints have you had? Out of 10 times, 5 should be without joint. You will get a still different perspective. Try it!!
Me - You had said "I am that by which I know "I Am".
Read it now and at least ten times when you are stoned and then write back." I was only folowing that instruction. Now you're changing the rules.
Arun - You should also reflect on--What is that, by which I know I Am.
Me - "What is that, by which I know I Am."
OK. Here goes:
If I think about it, the I walk the road trying to find out. In some moments or situations, theres a sense that I Am. Aloof, just an observer, though rarely focussed on oneself. Just calm, non-reactive, uninvolved. A detachment I oft term apathy. Thats an outcome of a whole host of other seeming constants like not feeling, caring, not wanting or desiring, that are facets of me that influence, what is that by which I think know "I Am".
No certainties, no illusions. So what is that by which I know..... Purely knowledge, experience and intellect I guess! Applied through the stream of reason in a framework that, Nature and Nurture evolved. I think I can draw an analogy to our conversational content.....Its like a yin-yang rubbing of a yin-yang space, thats smoothening the alignment of the conceptual interface!
Arun - OK, now next exercise. Which of the two statements you agree with and why:
1. I think, (therefore) I Am.
2. I Am (therefore), I think.
Me - First reaction was a good laugh......
Me - Is there a perspective difference between: I can think therefore, I Am and the statements without the element of choice. I think (therefore), I Am makes it a prerogative activity!
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Another NCYEC moment
Me - Smoking on the terrace and on impulse decided to give the pots on the terrace a new aesthetic. Labored and sweated for an hour till I was finally satisfied. sat back then to savor the look. Suddenly realised that all that effort would not necessarily reflect to the casual observer. The layout was pretty much the same. Neater, cleaner. Only a close look would reveal the plant symmetry and placement associations. Hey! So people wont know what I did, but I enjoyed doing it. Another "Nothings changed, yet everythings changed" moment!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
An Idle Life
Me -
Action
Normally
Invokes
Debatable
Logic
Eventually
Labelling
Intentions
Futile
Exercises
Live the quiet life...A la Oscar Wilde. In praise of idleness...
Arun - I hope you know what happened to him in the end.
Me - Its still a work in progressbro.... So whoeva else knows.....? I'm still living the experience!
Arun - Learn fro HIS experience--was it worth it?
Me - Its mostly first person man. The reflection was helicoptering to get the larger picture about ones possible life position scenarios in the near future. I looked dowm on me and decided what I should do in the best interest of my equanimity. Thats about as far as my reflective lens sees!
Arun - Well, as they say - do the dew!
Action
Normally
Invokes
Debatable
Logic
Eventually
Labelling
Intentions
Futile
Exercises
Live the quiet life...A la Oscar Wilde. In praise of idleness...
Arun - I hope you know what happened to him in the end.
Me - Its still a work in progressbro.... So whoeva else knows.....? I'm still living the experience!
Arun - Learn fro HIS experience--was it worth it?
Me - Its mostly first person man. The reflection was helicoptering to get the larger picture about ones possible life position scenarios in the near future. I looked dowm on me and decided what I should do in the best interest of my equanimity. Thats about as far as my reflective lens sees!
Arun - Well, as they say - do the dew!
Everything has changed yet nothing has changed
Me - In the attempts to decipher what is, on a relationship front,there is a wish frame of perceptions that build up, semi conscious.A template of responses one hopes to find yhat may fill in a nagging void.
And then, some honest plain speaking later, stuff gets underwhelmingly clear. Another"nothings changed, yet everythings changed" moment!. Whoa....!
Theres a great need to be liked. And you are told that you have been liked all along. All the trauma only contributed to focus and strength. Only the good and happy moments register. Despite al the apprehensions, a broader emotional framework is in place. One feels, though one is not particularly curious about where the other person is coming from. More internalised.
I have my goals and I'm comfy with who I am. You needn't have any apprehensions of scars on my psyche.
And as she said all of that, I couldn't help recognising shades of my own thought framework. Strange feeling. Kinda empty. No sense of playing out the wish frame, as I anticipated it.
Nothings changed, yet everythings changed!
Some more peace on earth.
And then, some honest plain speaking later, stuff gets underwhelmingly clear. Another"nothings changed, yet everythings changed" moment!. Whoa....!
Theres a great need to be liked. And you are told that you have been liked all along. All the trauma only contributed to focus and strength. Only the good and happy moments register. Despite al the apprehensions, a broader emotional framework is in place. One feels, though one is not particularly curious about where the other person is coming from. More internalised.
I have my goals and I'm comfy with who I am. You needn't have any apprehensions of scars on my psyche.
And as she said all of that, I couldn't help recognising shades of my own thought framework. Strange feeling. Kinda empty. No sense of playing out the wish frame, as I anticipated it.
Nothings changed, yet everythings changed!
Some more peace on earth.
Ouch....!
Lifes cool. All sorted out. Don't know if you've ever experienced a "Nothings changed, yet everythings changed" moment. "Twas just that.
All eeej well...
Oh trust me....I might give you a runfor your money on moments like those... U tc
OUCH....Gues recall is more vivid to those on the receiving end....Luv u.
All eeej well...
Oh trust me....I might give you a runfor your money on moments like those... U tc
OUCH....Gues recall is more vivid to those on the receiving end....Luv u.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Relationship altering/defining words
"I accept the bottomline you've arrived at. To be honest, I'm quite relieved to know where I stand. Thats phenomenonally lightening in my state of mind. So I'm cool with it. The choice for you though is to decidewhether you have considered all the perspectives and have all the knowledge in arriving at that bottomline. I don't think you have a clue about my perspective especially considering that I am supposedly the one who has brought ruin and suffering on this family! The choice is yours. If you want to know, you have to ask. On the other hand, if you are comfortable in the knowledge that has led you to this conclusion......I'm cool with that too.
Just remember that I'm always there. But now, you'll have to ask."
(Choked on those last two sentences. The emotional blip lasted about10 mins. N then feeling deserted.....A lightness of being descended.)
Just remember that I'm always there. But now, you'll have to ask."
(Choked on those last two sentences. The emotional blip lasted about10 mins. N then feeling deserted.....A lightness of being descended.)
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Nothings changed yet everything has changed
Me - Nothing has changed yet everything has changed. That statement is now clearer. In a sense it facilitates thot-less response. But the world may see that as quite thoughtless!...Crunch!!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Some philosophy
Me - Drop me some philosophy. Feeling kind of empty here. I dont even know if theres a need to think or, just stay uninvolved and let the story play out for itself and, respond on cue.
Arun - Well, My philosophy would be, to do that which makes you feel a better human being in your own eyes.
Me - Kinda saw that coming... Great conversationalist you make!
Time does take care of it all. As they say.... All eeej well.
Haven't gotten around todefining a template of Being. Just doing what I can to live, without conscience calls and regrets.Does that make me a better human being in my eyes....Not really focussed on that adjective.
Arun - Another and actually the only way out of all life's problems is to REALISE that we are not separate individuals, there is only "I". There is no you, me, or we. I still havent been able to realise it, though, I have an intellectual understanding of the same, and, it definitely helps in constantly trying to see yourself in others or vice versa. You realise that there is no individual doer of any deed; takes away lot of hatred and regrets.
If you are not hurting anybody, then, whatever you do is OK.
Me -That's a huge transitional mental block bro! A huge leap to the presumption of Oneness and, an ordained script. Life, as each of us know and make it to be, is the raison d'etre of species homo sapien. At the core of it is the individual, his/her gene pool and the persona nurtured through the situations in life. Each perceives hurt differently. each responds and feels in their own way. Not suffering the baggage of rebirth but, coping as best as circumstances allow. And 50,000 years down the line someone will discern Homo something just as we learn about Homo erectus now. Ya bro. I bat for natural selection. Still grounded knowing you can only do what you can do. Its each for themselves. We carry our own crosses. Each one decides when to set down the cross, choose to recognise what their crosses are. And that end is all the succor one can provide. Rationality or Spirituality or Religion are the frameworks to that understanding. ut the eventual choice is individual.....Depending on how you perceive that entity!!
Arun - I knew you won't agree. Pardon my saying that it is this individualistic philosophy which has brought the whole world in the state that it is in - dog eat dog and one-pmanship.. It only breeds hatred, jealousy and makes a man feel isolated.
Me - Whats wrong with being individualistic and isolated. So long as its on your own terms.Dog eat dog may be the prevalent societal theme but its definitely not a generic one.. If you cant beat em, you dont need to join em. One can just withdraw.Man can be an island, self sufficiently. Remember you quoted that its not what you add but when you have nothing left to give away. How better to do that than to take responsibility for yourself, the individual. Thats all you have control over. As to the philosophy of life, need based response, including the need for answers, when felt, may or may not make inroads into my current world view. As of now, most stuff has an explanation. Dont feel the need for value addition.
Arun - I dont know whether I anm competent enough to say so, but I think you should do a revisit on your philosophy of life - though its the most accepted one.
Arun - Well, My philosophy would be, to do that which makes you feel a better human being in your own eyes.
Me - Kinda saw that coming... Great conversationalist you make!
Time does take care of it all. As they say.... All eeej well.
Haven't gotten around todefining a template of Being. Just doing what I can to live, without conscience calls and regrets.Does that make me a better human being in my eyes....Not really focussed on that adjective.
Arun - Another and actually the only way out of all life's problems is to REALISE that we are not separate individuals, there is only "I". There is no you, me, or we. I still havent been able to realise it, though, I have an intellectual understanding of the same, and, it definitely helps in constantly trying to see yourself in others or vice versa. You realise that there is no individual doer of any deed; takes away lot of hatred and regrets.
If you are not hurting anybody, then, whatever you do is OK.
Me -That's a huge transitional mental block bro! A huge leap to the presumption of Oneness and, an ordained script. Life, as each of us know and make it to be, is the raison d'etre of species homo sapien. At the core of it is the individual, his/her gene pool and the persona nurtured through the situations in life. Each perceives hurt differently. each responds and feels in their own way. Not suffering the baggage of rebirth but, coping as best as circumstances allow. And 50,000 years down the line someone will discern Homo something just as we learn about Homo erectus now. Ya bro. I bat for natural selection. Still grounded knowing you can only do what you can do. Its each for themselves. We carry our own crosses. Each one decides when to set down the cross, choose to recognise what their crosses are. And that end is all the succor one can provide. Rationality or Spirituality or Religion are the frameworks to that understanding. ut the eventual choice is individual.....Depending on how you perceive that entity!!
Arun - I knew you won't agree. Pardon my saying that it is this individualistic philosophy which has brought the whole world in the state that it is in - dog eat dog and one-pmanship.. It only breeds hatred, jealousy and makes a man feel isolated.
Me - Whats wrong with being individualistic and isolated. So long as its on your own terms.Dog eat dog may be the prevalent societal theme but its definitely not a generic one.. If you cant beat em, you dont need to join em. One can just withdraw.Man can be an island, self sufficiently. Remember you quoted that its not what you add but when you have nothing left to give away. How better to do that than to take responsibility for yourself, the individual. Thats all you have control over. As to the philosophy of life, need based response, including the need for answers, when felt, may or may not make inroads into my current world view. As of now, most stuff has an explanation. Dont feel the need for value addition.
Arun - I dont know whether I anm competent enough to say so, but I think you should do a revisit on your philosophy of life - though its the most accepted one.
Afterthoughts
Me - Do you do whats right for yourself or should response also factor in another's perspective. The latter affects you to the extent of wanting to leave more objective memories of situations and be judged in that light. Guess that is a base parental instinct. On the other hand.... Hoe does it matter. She's chosen to be who she is and its her life. Not much I can do!
1443 hrs
Just another step closer to understanding that .... nothing really matters.
What is not felt, is not known.What is not known exists only as an articulation of someones Experience. You relate to it distanced from the moment. At best trying to conceptualise feeling, or draw parallels from the words. Gives you some understanding and ...closure too.
1443 hrs
Just another step closer to understanding that .... nothing really matters.
What is not felt, is not known.What is not known exists only as an articulation of someones Experience. You relate to it distanced from the moment. At best trying to conceptualise feeling, or draw parallels from the words. Gives you some understanding and ...closure too.
Reality bytes
Getting along in a relationships, one still water scenario. Keep the surface calm and placid so it mirrors peace.All the rippling is on the banks, washing up feel good sensitivities that detract from the churning depths. And every once in a while a pebble from the shores ones on gets thrown in and connects to that churning and....BOOM!
A rip tide of the frustrations of not being understood is unleashed. Just one short swell before control is established...., and the churning lessened, thanks to that vent. But thats enough for the banks to be breached and the shoreline.....resemble the familiar ravages of old...
AAaaaahh! The joys of observing ones life and pretty much not giving a shit....'coz this story has already been told!
The next morning.....
Guess the after wind is a knock out too. When you are told by your daughter that your views don't matter 'coz... you walked away from her life and her mother stuck with her.
Bottom line reality I say. Cool man. So now I know why you feel what you feel. Her perspective of reality will take a couple of hours to settle in, and clear a lot of stuff. While I mull over whether to just accept and live with that or attempt to fill in a few gaps by explaining my reality!
Either way, one feels a whole lot lighter now.
A rip tide of the frustrations of not being understood is unleashed. Just one short swell before control is established...., and the churning lessened, thanks to that vent. But thats enough for the banks to be breached and the shoreline.....resemble the familiar ravages of old...
AAaaaahh! The joys of observing ones life and pretty much not giving a shit....'coz this story has already been told!
The next morning.....
Guess the after wind is a knock out too. When you are told by your daughter that your views don't matter 'coz... you walked away from her life and her mother stuck with her.
Bottom line reality I say. Cool man. So now I know why you feel what you feel. Her perspective of reality will take a couple of hours to settle in, and clear a lot of stuff. While I mull over whether to just accept and live with that or attempt to fill in a few gaps by explaining my reality!
Either way, one feels a whole lot lighter now.
Friday, June 18, 2010
AN IDLE LIFE
Me -
Anything
Not
Intended
Deserves
Leisurely
Examination
Lest
Intent
Fuel Enthusiasm
Now that is a steady state of being.. The capacity to live AN IDLE LIFE....
Anything
Not
Intended
Deserves
Leisurely
Examination
Lest
Intent
Fuel Enthusiasm
Now that is a steady state of being.. The capacity to live AN IDLE LIFE....
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Echoes...
N she goes quiet on me.
Distracted by toil or an impenetrable foil...
Its not plain to see.
Thoughts take wing on time-outs
from the activity morass you choose to be stuck in.
Swamped by broad brush adrenalin rushes,
insulated from feeling.
N she goes quiet on me....
For better or for worse..
This is a curse
that has me revisiting the greys,
In my otherwise black n white world.
You are one who can evoke the closest sensation
to what a whole host of verbiage,
attempts to describe as Feeling.
Is that forbidden fruit?!
14:33 PM
Well...Well...Well!!
Stubborn silence....No show n Tell.
Maybe committment kind of brushes off onto you,
and you just do more, more, more of what ever keeps you distracted.
What an idea Sirji!!
Distracted by toil or an impenetrable foil...
Its not plain to see.
Thoughts take wing on time-outs
from the activity morass you choose to be stuck in.
Swamped by broad brush adrenalin rushes,
insulated from feeling.
N she goes quiet on me....
For better or for worse..
This is a curse
that has me revisiting the greys,
In my otherwise black n white world.
You are one who can evoke the closest sensation
to what a whole host of verbiage,
attempts to describe as Feeling.
Is that forbidden fruit?!
14:33 PM
Well...Well...Well!!
Stubborn silence....No show n Tell.
Maybe committment kind of brushes off onto you,
and you just do more, more, more of what ever keeps you distracted.
What an idea Sirji!!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
A Ramble...
Me -A Ramble....
An understanding of what is can be a continual process of expanding one's domain knowledge, till you arrive at an Acceptance that, just this, is is the boundary to one's domain. Nature and nurture have determined the quality of emotional response in this Acceptance.
Emotions, I guess, are experienced feelings reflecting a state of mind. The primary triggers of the experience seem rooted in one's likes and dislikes and the thots they evoke that are then felt as feeling and interests. Ones likes are anchored in the residual memories from one's experiences in life. The non-registering in memory of strong likes and dislikes, thus limit the qualitative experience of emotional responses, be it happiness or grief. Desire and Want too..
Why life didnt register is but hindsight hypotheses now. And one's feeling frame is basically guided by a memory vacuum, as there are no real impressions from life available on recall that trigger happiness, sadness etc. in the absence of benchmark experience from life. Helps tho in my planes of equanimity. Gives new insight to the term "Cant be bothered" too!!
Arun -The bottom line is just to BE, and not trying to Become (happy or sad).
Me -Aware of that. Just being is what sees me through my days. The ripples arise when the world around attributes one's state as their perception of You've become. And I guess its also about the knowledge and experiencing of feeling. To be, one cantafford to be ignorant about the facets that represent becoming, so that, not to be is a recognised chimera.
Arun -Well, my philosophy would be, to do that which makes you feel ba better human being in your own eyes.
An understanding of what is can be a continual process of expanding one's domain knowledge, till you arrive at an Acceptance that, just this, is is the boundary to one's domain. Nature and nurture have determined the quality of emotional response in this Acceptance.
Emotions, I guess, are experienced feelings reflecting a state of mind. The primary triggers of the experience seem rooted in one's likes and dislikes and the thots they evoke that are then felt as feeling and interests. Ones likes are anchored in the residual memories from one's experiences in life. The non-registering in memory of strong likes and dislikes, thus limit the qualitative experience of emotional responses, be it happiness or grief. Desire and Want too..
Why life didnt register is but hindsight hypotheses now. And one's feeling frame is basically guided by a memory vacuum, as there are no real impressions from life available on recall that trigger happiness, sadness etc. in the absence of benchmark experience from life. Helps tho in my planes of equanimity. Gives new insight to the term "Cant be bothered" too!!
Arun -The bottom line is just to BE, and not trying to Become (happy or sad).
Me -Aware of that. Just being is what sees me through my days. The ripples arise when the world around attributes one's state as their perception of You've become. And I guess its also about the knowledge and experiencing of feeling. To be, one cantafford to be ignorant about the facets that represent becoming, so that, not to be is a recognised chimera.
Arun -Well, my philosophy would be, to do that which makes you feel ba better human being in your own eyes.
The Sounds of Silence...
Communication Luv is so simple really. Yet its a sense, a feeling, that we tend to botch up by applying thought. The next msg gives you an insight Why! Inspired by your April silences...
Takes but a thot
to trigger memories.
Just another stray one
to inflame them.
How fickle of mind are we.
So thotful, tet thotless, in-deed.
Takes but a thot....
to bury memories.
So heres a thot that would really help demonstrate thotfulness. Gift me another Zippo. Your first one to me has just about stopped spittin fir at me.... like you? The memory of this other guy whose Zippo collection you kept expanding by way of birthday gifts has always haunted me. And induced this shameless ask.
Takes but a thot....
9:03 AM
The parallel track that comes into play while communicating feel good ironically is, anxiety. It keeps building up in the anticipation of response. Classic "Will She, Wont She" scenario.
Expectation, Approval....all foundations for bummers. Then again, the proverbial thorns that go hand in hand with the appreciation of a rose! Talk to me!
wthr, finally raining, got tons of wrk waiting 4 me.
v hv regressed 2 talkin bout th weather n th hum drum of life hv we!!
Sorry about that rejoinder.Just got the first part of your message. The sentiment still stands tho. Its about progression, acceptance, inclinations, expression. Never regression.
The msg I sent then wasin response to he Good Times you allude to ((* May) Here it is again..(Off the blog)
While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions. You cant talk your way out of what you've behaved yourself into. Be wary in the Good Times. TC
Straight from the heart concern. I sense a drift in you in your search for meaningful anchors. TC.
BTW who is the anonymous "Zippo guy" who you appear to be a tad fond of and who said hi to me. I do like to know who I'm acknowledging familiarity from.
Takes but a thot
to trigger memories.
Just another stray one
to inflame them.
How fickle of mind are we.
So thotful, tet thotless, in-deed.
Takes but a thot....
to bury memories.
So heres a thot that would really help demonstrate thotfulness. Gift me another Zippo. Your first one to me has just about stopped spittin fir at me.... like you? The memory of this other guy whose Zippo collection you kept expanding by way of birthday gifts has always haunted me. And induced this shameless ask.
Takes but a thot....
9:03 AM
The parallel track that comes into play while communicating feel good ironically is, anxiety. It keeps building up in the anticipation of response. Classic "Will She, Wont She" scenario.
Expectation, Approval....all foundations for bummers. Then again, the proverbial thorns that go hand in hand with the appreciation of a rose! Talk to me!
wthr, finally raining, got tons of wrk waiting 4 me.
v hv regressed 2 talkin bout th weather n th hum drum of life hv we!!
Sorry about that rejoinder.Just got the first part of your message. The sentiment still stands tho. Its about progression, acceptance, inclinations, expression. Never regression.
The msg I sent then wasin response to he Good Times you allude to ((* May) Here it is again..(Off the blog)
While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions. You cant talk your way out of what you've behaved yourself into. Be wary in the Good Times. TC
Straight from the heart concern. I sense a drift in you in your search for meaningful anchors. TC.
BTW who is the anonymous "Zippo guy" who you appear to be a tad fond of and who said hi to me. I do like to know who I'm acknowledging familiarity from.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Boost
Me - Boost!The secret to vistas that free your mind. Good morning and have a great day.
Arun -I see you are in high spirits.
Me - I find myself totally with myself when I'm alone. I get brief spells of those moments during the day. 0830 to 1000 and post 11 at night when they are asleep.
The spirits can roam free then, without intent and purpose being insinuated or attributed. just doing it without looking over your shoulder or letting irritation get an exaperated response out!
Arun -I see you are in high spirits.
Me - I find myself totally with myself when I'm alone. I get brief spells of those moments during the day. 0830 to 1000 and post 11 at night when they are asleep.
The spirits can roam free then, without intent and purpose being insinuated or attributed. just doing it without looking over your shoulder or letting irritation get an exaperated response out!
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
A High
A cool breezy night. Stoned on my first joint in more than a year.This is the nearest sensation to happiness I feel, as the equivalent of that oft described but not satisfactorily templated, in feeling terms, term.(love this lang ha ha). N lifes cool. I think I'm spoilt for society now. I really yearn for the solitude of my life. And Hi.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Therefore I Am....?
Arun - Following is the crux of the matter:
It is necessary to understand that I Am,
In order that I may know that I Am Not,
So that, at last, I may realise that....I Am Not,
therefore I Am
Me - Understanding that I Am establishes a reference point for Me. I thence come to know and realise What I Am Not. And therefore accept What I Am. Thats my tangible perspective.
Arun - I am and I am not, and only in that sense I Am?
Me - I Am and I Am Not. Thats the understanding of What Is. That is the basis for realising who and what I Am. Its in that sense that I know I Am. A yin-yang like clarity.
It is necessary to understand that I Am,
In order that I may know that I Am Not,
So that, at last, I may realise that....I Am Not,
therefore I Am
Me - Understanding that I Am establishes a reference point for Me. I thence come to know and realise What I Am Not. And therefore accept What I Am. Thats my tangible perspective.
Arun - I am and I am not, and only in that sense I Am?
Me - I Am and I Am Not. Thats the understanding of What Is. That is the basis for realising who and what I Am. Its in that sense that I know I Am. A yin-yang like clarity.
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